Arguing with my husband last night about the dishes in the sink brought something to my attention. A little voice inside my head said “God isn’t going to be mad if the dishes aren’t done. And if the laundry stays in the dryer.”
I’m a perfectionist. I love going to bed with my house clean, tidy and organized. I love waking up to a clean and tidy house. I love to be prepared and I love to live in harmony with my home. Recently, it’s been extremely taxing on my energy though.
Since starting my job in May, I’ve had significantly less time at home. Traveling to the office for a roundtrip of over 2 hours per day has take over 4 hours per week from my schedule. I used to work from home 2 days a week, saving me time on my commute. Allowing me time to be clean, organized, laundry done, etc. However, commuting everyday has really taken that time away from me.
It’s draining and I’m trying to learn how to do things differently but it’s freaking hard! I don’t know how to get everything done. Can’t I just hire a house keeper to come twice a day to do the things I do?
Anyway, I realized that the things I was stressing about aren’t a HUGE deal. The dishes can go in the dishwasher and I can run that dishwasher off daily if I need to. The floors did need to be vacuumed because our son loves to eat all over the house and I let him because he’s two and barely eats as is. Non-negotiable for me to walk around stepping on cereal, oranges, hot dogs and carrots. But the dishes. The dishes are really out of the way if they’re in the sink and they CAN all fit in the dishwasher.
See, I think we’re all just too hard on ourselves. We put so much pressure on ourselves to do everything and do it right now. My lack of time is definitely taking a toll on me – but what’s really taking a toll on me are my excuses regarding my lack of time. My exhaustion because I’m wearing myself thin with all of the commitments, pressure and STUFF we have. Living a more simple life would help alleviate some of this stress.
Living a life where I don’t have so many things laying around the house or on the floor or in our closets would give us space. We don’t need to go buy a bigger house to stuff with more things. We need to ELIMINATE what we have so we can enjoy what we LOVE.
This all went down in my mind last night as I was washing those dishes, then folding the laundry. Do we ever just take a moment to BE in the moment, as moms and women? Or are you constantly thinking of the next thing like I am?
So the night when on with the dishes being done, the laundry being folded, the floors being cleaned. Finally at 7:30pm I sat down with my husband and son to heat my hip that was hurting me and drink some water. Then at 8pm I took our son to bed and laid with him a bit, read him some stories and said goodnight. Went to the kitchen and pressed play on my workout. At 8:50 I was finally done my workout, and made a smoothie, prepped the coffee for the morning and sat on the couch with my husband to catch up on one of my favorite shows these days – Floribama Shore. It really makes me feel like I’m still having somewhat of a social life to watch the cast drink their faces off every night in a nice beach town. Then I went upstairs around 10 to shower and head to bed. I had to just take a deep breath thinking of all of that again!
Before bed, I asked for some direction on this situation I’m having. I asked for direction on how to make my life more simple. How to give up the perfectionism. How to just simply “not care and relax”. How to adjust to this new schedule. How to put myself before cleaning the floor. I don’t know if God answered me last night but today I woke up wanting to purge all the things.
Sometimes what we need isn’t more, it’s less. That’s exactly what I need right now. I need less stuff. Less pressure. Less negativity.
If you’re struggling with a similar situation, I encourage you to ask for direction to whoever/whatever you believe in. Write it out. Say it out loud. Talk it through in your mind. With a friend. With a pet. Any way you can get it out to the universe that you’re looking because believe me the answer will come.
As for the dishes, and the laundry – those things will always be. We just need to find different ways to manage them. Sometimes we need to manage the chores rather than let the chores manage us. Life happens way too quickly to not stop and enjoy it! I am grateful for those dishes because it means we have food to eat. I’m grateful for that laundry because it means my house is full. Shifting perspective can be the answer you’re looking for.